Refusing marriage to finish your studies?
Ruling concerning a young lady who refuses marriage in order to finish her studies
Question: A common practice today is for a young lady or her father to refuse one who proposes in order for the woman to finish her high school, college or study of certain years. What is the ruling concerning that? What is your advice to those who do such, given that many times the woman reaches the age of thirty or more without getting married?
Response: This practice goes against what the Prophet (sallAllaahu 'alayhi wa sallam) commanded. The Prophet (sallAllaahu 'alayhi wa sallam) said:
"If one whose religion and character pleases you comes to you [for proposal], then marry him".
The Messenger of Allaah (sallAllaahu 'alayhi wa sallam) also said:
"O youth, whoever of you has the means to get married should get married for it lowers the gaze and protects the chastity".
By preventing marriage, one loses out on the benefits of marriage. I advise my brother Muslims who are the guardians of women and my sister Muslims not to keep from marriage due to finishing school or teaching. In fact, the woman may put a condition upon her husband that she may remain studying until she finishes her studies or she remain teaching for a year or two, given that she does not become busy with her children. There is no harm in such an act.
However, a matter which needs further consideration is where the woman is continuing her studies in an area that is not truly needed. In my view, when a woman finishes the elementary stages and has the ability to read and write, thereby being able to benefit from her knowledge through reading the Book of Allaah, its tafseer, the hadeeth of the Prophet (sallAllaahu 'alayhi wa sallam) and their explanation, that is all she really needs. Unless, of course, she is continuing her studies in an area that the people need, such as medicine and similar fields. This is also conditional that the study not involve aspects which are forbidden, such as mixing with men and so forth.
Shaykh Ibn 'Uthaymeen (rahimahUllaah)
Fataawa al-Marah
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